Many people complain about their lives and say they want it to be different.
However, when I look at them from the outside, I realize that I am not seeing the slightest action to initiate the much desired change and I have the feeling that, in fact, they are just words, probably said in an ordinary conversation at a cup of coffee. Because I know for sure, as the Englishman says, that “where there’s a will, there’s a way”, that is, in Romanian, if you want, you can!
Many long for the future to arrive as if it were a magical space of time in which all problems are solved. They long for Friday, summer, the Christmas holidays or I don’t know what else. They believe that when they manage to move into their dream home they will be happy, that the long-awaited promotion will eventually bring satisfaction, they believe that they will achieve happiness after they get married or have children. Nothing more false… because everything is, in fact, a transfer of our satisfaction in external factors. We put our happiness on the shoulders of others. And so, between a hope and an illusion, life flows, laden with dissatisfaction, frustration, too much compromise, consumption in “love relationships” and the slogan “love my job”, and often, when it all ends, we wonder, then we get angry and at the end we ask ourselves, bitterly, “Why?”.
I strongly believe that if we really want something, we should start the journey immediately, without waiting for the perfect moment. If we wait for optimal weather conditions, we will probably never reach our destination. And the journey is all the more fascinating as we go through rains, storms, snow and scorching sun. Because we prove to ourselves that we can do anything, anyhow, anytime.
When we are afraid to move in the direction of our dreams, we console ourselves with the idea that, at some point, the most favorable conditions will come. So we are waiting for Monday to start a diet, we do not go to the doctor because we still do not hurt, it is not the time to have a child because we did not buy a house! We are waiting for New Year’s Eve to come to create new plans, we are waiting for the weekend to come to have fun. When faced with a thorny situation that makes us feel bad, we prefer to hope that something from the outside will change, that something / someone will come to our rescue, “a prince on a white horse” or “a fairy with a wand magical “. It’s nice to read fairy tales, but not to live in them. We rarely realize that the savior is me EU and we learn with difficulty that nothing will change if we do not start working for our dreams. We read different books, which we hope will influence our lives for the better, dreaming that one day we will do the same, just like the hero in the book. But books are fiction, because we’re not there. We listen to motivational speeches, hoping to move the mountains from place to place. We often hope in vain, and the disappointment is even deeper.
Making a decision to take the first step sets in motion a series of conditions that determine us to fulfill our desires. And these conditions require change. Earthquake. Change is very difficult to digest, both for us and for those around us. One of the mistakes most of us make is that we are always looking for approvals for our lives, and that is because, deep down, we are trying to run away from taking the responsability. If you really want an opinion about something, go either to someone who does not know you closely, because he can see the situation from another angle and can give you some objective advice, or to someone you know can think coldly and wish you well. We are social beings, we need confirmation, validation, it is perfectly fine to want to be accepted and loved. But, beyond that, we must learn to validate ourselves, to tear down and rebuild, to assume what we choose, not to run, to look at ourselves and (re) discover ourselves in all our power. and our beauty.
Let’s learn to be adults. And by that I define awareness, accountability, movement!
The advice I give, and I give from the bottom of my heart, is this: Live in the present. Enjoy the here and now, without hanging on to the past and depending on the future. Create a positive and proactive mindset. Seize the opportunities, pay attention to people, be in touch with yourself. Be optimistic, but not a naive one, who does not make decisions and believes that problems will solve themselves, because this attitude has all the chances to turn you into a convinced pessimist. Try to be a realistic optimist, who knows the risks very well and takes them into account. This way you will be able to enjoy the roses, avoiding the thorns.
Don’t let unpleasant experiences turn you into a sad person, don’t let the painful moments turn out the light in your eyes. We all have hard times, we all have difficult days, we all have obstacles. These are just lessons to learn from. Let’s learn that we are stronger than we think and that we only need to trust ourselves. And a smile. Always a smile.
